SOME HEALTHY HABITS OF EFFECTIVE COUPLES

Every one desires an effortless love, but the truth is this, Love doesn’t come easy. It’s quite tempting to just sit back and enjoy or bask in that new love relationship when you find one, but let’s say you want one that can stand the test of time. Any relationship whether college, Uni or even one that develops at some point in one’s life require daily effort and good habits. Because I know it’s not always sunshine and rainbow the moment you are a Facebook official, I still believe there are ways to make that possible in your relationship. What are those things couples you admire are doing that have kept their relationships alive? You may have seen their relationships evolve say from college and they are still waxing strong. You see them walk by and all you can think of is ‘awwwww’, and you can’t help but envy them!

The honest truth is these couples also experience their low times as well as their high times because they are human. Those attributes, qualities, habits that make them look or seem endlessly happy are also the ones which they adopt to overcome times of stress, disagreements and general low times.  A lot of people livve in the world of fantasy assuming that the best couples  don’t have challenges, I know they do, they are couples that recover from  rough patches like true pros. The question now is how can you deal with relationship obstacles and move on smoothly? What distinguishes couples in Love from those that are not?  I have compiled some real habits which I believe can help you become more effective and well positioned for a better future and track.  

1. Look before you Leap

Love at First site is not a myth, but I will always advocate an establishment of friendship first before anything else.  Being friends with someone beforehand can lead to a strong beautiful relationship because of the foundation.  This is because being friends first gives you the opportunity to know each other better without any form of pressure at all. Also, it is an opportunity for you to have an idea or get a preview of how they behave, react, deal with issues when faced with different life scenarios. So don’t be too hasty to choose someone, and it’s always easier and less hassle when you go for someone that has the same values and goals.

2. Don’t get in the way! Have a mutual respect

This is a very simple yet a very powerful relationship essential a lot of couples lack.  It is more like the air any relationship needs to thrive. With respect, you can navigate daily love-life occurrences with more ease than you can imagine. When mutual relationship lacks in a relationship, you will become a struggling couple. Having respect for each other will help you both avoid unnecessary fault finding routine about everything and prevent arguments from deteriorating to hurtful path where name calling and all manner of contempt exist.  

3. Have a sense of direction! Where are you both heading?

Knowing a little summary of where you both are heading, more like your future plans, aspirations and goals, will help you stay on the same page and work together as a couple.  Some people stay in relationships and do not take in to consideration, the need to know their overall goals and interests. When they eventually get married, there are several conflicts of interests, which often times lead to divorce and heart breaks. Make hay while the sun shines, by objectively gathering the necessary facts before talking the big talk of marriage.

4. Run away from Lying and Cheating!

Truth can be hurtful sometimes, but you’d rather say the truth than bring lies in to your relationship.  Loving healthy relationship gives honesty a very big priority, puts it on a high pedestal right where it belongs. No matter how little a lie is, once it is found out, a seed of distrust and doubts have been sown and have great potential to grow over time. Then here comes another big one, Cheating! This can completely ruin a relationship; avoid it, especially if you want to stay in that relationship. If you find yourself constantly lying and cheating, the best thing for the two people involved is to end that relationship, because it has deteriorated to a very unhealthy level.

5. Words are powerful

Communication is one classic cliché. Effective couples use this tool to keep their relationships alive.  They are open to each other about their lives (past, present, future). They keep it real, no games at all.  Bottling things up will keep you both in the dark. When you are mad about anything, it is better to let your feelings be known rather than keeps everyone thinking you are in a bad mood. It takes courage for me to communicate to my husband because it involves being vulnerable, but afterwards, you find yourself in a stronger relationship. Don’t waste your day being grumpy and overly mad when few minutes of conversation can fix everything.

6. Don’t take anything for granted
Many relationships have broken up, for what may seem like a minor or silly reason.  The truth is there are relationship mistakes which add up over time and can cause a little spark to set a big fire, thereby bringing a very beautiful relationship to an end. We are all prone to mistakes from time to time because we are human and have our independent minds, however, there is need to make up for the wrongs you have done in your relationship to avoid getting to the “last straw point”.

7. Kiss Often

The penultimate habit is the physical aspect of your relationship. Don’t let the physical side suffer no matter how great your verbal side is. Read my post on intimacy in marriage http://www.lauranwodo.blogspot.co.uk/p/intimacyin-marriage-encouraging-married.html  Kissing for sure promotes a closer relationship. According to a new study on couple relationship, a kiss releases oxytocin in your brain, which promotes interpersonal bonding that alleviates stress.  Unplanned make out sessions are so ideal!

8. Prayer is the key

This remains the ultimate relationship habit for couples who want  to remain effective . When you pray together, you are sharing the same purpose, which gives you two that sense of togetherness to stay focused and strive towards a continuous bliss. Don’t joke with this, it’s a powerful force.

I know there are endless habits which any one can come up with, based on experience and knowledge, these are few of mine which I know definitely work. So feel free to apply them.

With Love.xx