SOME HELPFUL WAYS TO DEAL WITH SELFISH PEOPLE

Often times we are surrounded by selfish and self-centred people, and most of the times we don’t know how to deal with them. here are some helpful ways to deal with this category of people. Now before I continue, I want to make sure we are on the same page. A selfish   person is one who most of the time concerned exclusively or excessively with oneself with little or no regard for the needs of others. A self-centred person can make you overwhelmed sometimes because they pressure/manipulate you to make them happy at all times. so let’s look at how to deal with them:

1. Try understanding where they are coming

It’s good to understand where their actions stem from. What really motivates their selfishness and what makes them act the way they do?  Sometimes it could be as a result of anxiety or insecurity or a case of someone simply being mean and considerate. If you think it’s worth it, just go that extra mile to find out.

2. DON’T TAKE IT PERSONALLY!

Their behaviour will definitely infuriate you and bother you, but try not to take it personally. It’s probably the same way they act with everybody, so it’s not only you. Just because someone tells you that you’re being selfish, mean, and inconsiderate or simply not being a good friend, does not mean that all those things are true.

3. avoid being defensive

It’s not worth being defensive when a selfish person is criticising you. Hear them out, try your best to control your temper, and remind yourself that you can only change your perception not the way others see things.

4. DON’T ASSUME

Some of our assumptions sometimes are incorrect and misleading. If you are being accused of being self-centred, try finding out the reason behind the statement. We are often tempted to make assumptions that are incorrect or misleading. Be calm and find out how you are being selfish. This way, you will find if what you’re doing is really bothering them or if they are just being selfish and demanding.

5. A CERTAIN AMOUNT OF SELFISHNESS IS HEALTHY

A little bit of self-centredness is healthy because it allows you to take care of yourself first and have the energy to take care/ help others as well. There are times when it’s good to be a little bit selfish, so it’s unfair to judge others harshly.

6. SET BOUNDARIES

It is absolutely necessary to set some clear boundaries in order to protect yourself, especially with selfish people.  Just speak up for yourself when it’s getting unhealthy and you are feeling uncomfortable as the other person begins to step on your toes. Be aware that if you don’t allow people to act selfishly they will learn to be more reasonable and more considerate.

7. DON’T FEED/INDULGE THEIR SELFISHNESS

The last but not the least important point is NEVER feed or indulge their selfishness. If on a daily basis you have to deal with a selfish person, ensure you do not feed their selfish sense of self importance. Stay true to what you believe in and to yourself. Approach them with patience and calmly let them know why you would do a certain thing and not what they demand you to do

Easier said than done like every other life challenging situation! but never impossible. Having to deal with a selfish and self-centred person definitely requires enough patience and few tricks. Are you currently dealing with a selfish person? Why not share some of the helpful ways you approach/deal with them?